Best Performance by anyone who came near the Screen: Heath Ledger as the Joker (the Dark Knight)
- The fact that his Golden Globe nomination and subsequent win was for a Supporting Role is ridiculous. Ledger managed to create a character that demanded the audience's full attention making every word he spoke more interesting than most of the movies released in '08. From the movie Trailer, to the teaser poster, the Joker built an overwhelming anticipation for the Dark Knight, and upon helping to deliver a masterpiece of a movie Ledger captivated the crowds without distracting from the film. Pure Gold. And he definitely "Put a smile on That face!"
Best Trailers:
- Pineapple Express (Red Band)
- the Dark Knight (Theatrical)
- In Bruges (Theatrical)
- Quantum of Solace (TV Spot)
- Rocknrolla (Theatrical)
- Funny Games (Theatrical)
Top Scary-Me Crazy Movies:
- the Strangers
- the Ruins
- the Eye
- the 11th Hour
- Shutter
- the Orphanage (okay this might be an '07 film, but it's scary enough to defeat calendar constraints)
Best Line of the Year: "What the Fuck have you done today?!" - James McAvoy as Wesley Gibson (Wanted)
- It could have been the Joker's "Let's put a smile on that face!", or "Why so Serious!" or anything from 'In Bruges', 'Burn After Reading', or 'Step Brothers', BUT having McAvoy look into the camera at the end of a killer monologue that caped the building energy of Wanted and slap you with these words of wisdom... it got applause. It was Fantastic!
- It could have been the Joker's "Let's put a smile on that face!", or "Why so Serious!" or anything from 'In Bruges', 'Burn After Reading', or 'Step Brothers', BUT having McAvoy look into the camera at the end of a killer monologue that caped the building energy of Wanted and slap you with these words of wisdom... it got applause. It was Fantastic!
Be my Girlfriend Honors:
(It takes more than just Hottie-Accessories... these girlies are the real deal)
- Mila Kunitz (Forgetting Sarah Marshall)
- Anne Hathaway (Get Smart)
- Michelle Monohan (Eagle Eye)
- Rachel Bilston (Jumper)
Badass Hottie that you're kind of afraid might kill you: Angelina Jolie (Wanted) 
The Crank Award / Single Man Wrecking Crew:
- Rambo: Stalon's John Rambo hasn't lost a step, he is still just as capable of slaughtering a jungles worth of Scum. You can't keep a good man down, and you can't keep a good Rambo from saving the innocent and killing everything else.
- Quantum of Solace: What good is a license to kill if you aren’t going to use it? Bond has simply run out of patience for suggesting that the Bad Guys don’t do bad things, he has decided to kill them, all of them, and he seems to be fine with it. And I am fine with it too.
Best Porno with Editing, Transitions, a little music... and a Theatrical Release: Young People Fucking
- You might think this title is All-Talk, but it's pretty accurate; a movie about a bunch of young people... yep. (Film includes storyline, character development, and a few laughs as a bonus)
The Crank Award / Single Man Wrecking Crew:
- Rambo: Stalon's John Rambo hasn't lost a step, he is still just as capable of slaughtering a jungles worth of Scum. You can't keep a good man down, and you can't keep a good Rambo from saving the innocent and killing everything else.
- Quantum of Solace: What good is a license to kill if you aren’t going to use it? Bond has simply run out of patience for suggesting that the Bad Guys don’t do bad things, he has decided to kill them, all of them, and he seems to be fine with it. And I am fine with it too.
Best Porno with Editing, Transitions, a little music... and a Theatrical Release: Young People Fucking
- You might think this title is All-Talk, but it's pretty accurate; a movie about a bunch of young people... yep. (Film includes storyline, character development, and a few laughs as a bonus)
Favourite Villains:
- Gemma Ward, Kip Weeks, and Laura Margolis (the masked People from the Strangers)
- Jeff Bridges (Iron Man)- Ralph Fiennes (In Bruges)
- Roger Allam (British Bloke with the bad teeth from Speed Racer)
- Michael Pitt and Brady Corbet (the Boys of Funny Games)
- Roger Allam (British Bloke with the bad teeth from Speed Racer)
- Michael Pitt and Brady Corbet (the Boys of Funny Games)
Most Hated Villain: Little Girl from Atonement
- Wow, horrible, horrible person, makes me so mad!! (this is a 2007 movie, but my hatred for this little girl is deep, she may make the 2009 list)
- Wow, horrible, horrible person, makes me so mad!! (this is a 2007 movie, but my hatred for this little girl is deep, she may make the 2009 list)
True and Absolute Depression Award: Before the Devil Knows you're Dead.
- Just when you think things can't get worse, they do, and they continue to get worse until they finally reach the point where they can't get any worse... but they still get worse. Complete Misery. Good movie, but miserable, no redemption what so ever.
Five Point Palm Exploding Heart Technique Award: Skadoosh! (Kung Fu Panda)
- Right out of the pages of a Tarantino Script…
Best Car Chase: Speed Racer (the entire movie)
- This was a solid movie. I don't know how you are suppose to market a Feature based on a Japanimation Cartoon from the '60s that is both a family film and a mind blowing Wachowski creation, but I do know that even after I gave it the seal of approval I had quite the time trying to convince people to go see it. Watch it, it'll make you feel something.
Best Superhero Movie that didn't star Dark Knights or Jokers: Iron Man
- Robert Downey Jr. is unstoppable in this role. Additionally the hero of the film is an Engineer. Kudos to Swinger Favreau for glorifying the butt of far to many jokes. (As an Engineer I approve this movie - Tony Stark for President!)
Favourite Love Story: Wristcutters
- Not sappy, not a chick-flick, and not the usual boy-meets-girl Hollywood Extra Value Meal. Men do not Fear Wristcutters.
Forrest Gump / Go-Have-A-Good-Cry Award: the Curious Case of Benjamin Button
- The movie messes with your emotions (tough guys beware); you feel so much love for life and appreciation for what the world has to offer, while being crushed by a sadness and despair, and it happens all at the same time. The result is tears, lots of tears. I loved it.
Best Characters that weren't Ledger's Joker:
- Brad Pitt (Chad Feldneimer - Burn After Reading)- Logan Lerman (The Kid - Meet Bill)
- Ryan Gosling (Lars Lindstrom - Lars and the Real Girl)
- Russell Brand (Aldous Snow - Forgetting Sarah Marshall)
- Dwayne Johnson (Boxer Santaros - Southland Tales)
- Toby Kebbell (Johnny Quid - Rocknrolla)
- Bobb'e J. Thompson (Ronnie Shields - Role Models)
- Robert Downey Jr. (Kirk Lazarus - Tropic Thunder)
- James Franco (Saul Silver - Pineapple Express)
- Neil Patrick Harris (NPH - Harold and Kumar Escape from Guantanamo Bay)
Vampire Film Awards:
- Best Vampire Teen Romance Novel Adaptation: Twilight
- Best Swedish Vampire Love Story: Let the Right One In
Tarantino Award: Hell Ride
- QT had a hand in this one, and it's littered with tell-tale signs. Great dialogue, rich characters, and just a touch of inappropriate violence. It's the dirty world of Big Bad Bikes.
Best Indiana Jones Movie of the Year: Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull
- If you like Harrison Ford, you'll like it. If you like the Indy series, you'll like it. If you're a Shia fan, you'll like it. If you like action-adventure movies, you'll like it. If you like to pan movies because they're not legitimate contenders for best movie of Ever, you'll like it. If you think Indiana Jones and his Hat are unbearable... you may not like it.
Best Slaps Sequence: Rocknrolla
- There is also a very thorough explanation of when and how a Good Slap should be executed.
Tourism Award: In Bruges (I want to go to Belgium)
Best In-Movie Recap: Pineapple Express
- While sitting around a table in a coffee shop, still covered in the aftermath of the Chaos that only a Stoner-Action movie can provide, the gang talks about everything that has just happened and decides that they are best friends. This move is comedy gold.
Best Spontaneous Singing and Dancing Sequence: Southland Tales (Justin Timberlake - the Killers 'All These Things that I've Done')
Coolest Movie Abilities Prizes:
- Teleportation (Jumper)
- Curving Bullets (Wanted)
- Cutting off Heads with large knives (Rambo)
- Flying under the influence (Hancock)
- Crash Landing one's self (Ironman)
- Destroying Lots of Stuff (the Incredible Hulk)
- Kung-Fuing a Dumpling (Kung Fu Panda)
- Doing Math (21)
- Driving (Speed Racer)
- Getting Back into a Plane you've jumped out of without having it land (the Dark Knight)
'Coming of Age... Or Not' Award: Charlie Bartlett
- Aside from the fact that Downey Jr. is in this movie, and that people should automatically see any movie that he is in without asking questions, Charlie Bartlett is the result of a whole mix of classics with a touch of its own thing. Ferris Bueller + Harold and Maude + Rushmore + Thumbsucker + Rocket Science + attitude + clever wit = something pretty close to Charlie Bartlett. Watch it if you went to high school...
Best Theme Song: Another Way to Die - Jack White & Alicia Keys (Quantum of Solace)
- It was the first Bond song performed as a duet, brought intrigue and anticipation in the TV Spot trailer, and set the stage for classic 007 during the opening credits. Plus it gets trapped in your head... and you have no problem with that. "Another dirty money heaven-sent honey turning on a dime..."
Monster Movie Match Up: Cloverfield vs the Host
- And the winner is... just watch both. Cloverfield envelops you in the movie, surrounding you with its continuous destruction as the main characters race the streets of Manhattan carrying you in their hand-held. The Host slaps you in the face with complete Monster-Demolition, leaving a lot of carnage in it's path and a chance for heroics. (Additionally, if you switch from watching with sub-titles and instead turn on the English dubbing The Host becomes a comedy, and a funny one). Two great takes on the action-adventure set-up.
Best Running Movie: Run Fatboy Run
- Also best use of Chelsea Dagger by the Fratellis while a Simon Pegg runs in a speedo.
- It was the first Bond song performed as a duet, brought intrigue and anticipation in the TV Spot trailer, and set the stage for classic 007 during the opening credits. Plus it gets trapped in your head... and you have no problem with that. "Another dirty money heaven-sent honey turning on a dime..."
Monster Movie Match Up: Cloverfield vs the Host
- And the winner is... just watch both. Cloverfield envelops you in the movie, surrounding you with its continuous destruction as the main characters race the streets of Manhattan carrying you in their hand-held. The Host slaps you in the face with complete Monster-Demolition, leaving a lot of carnage in it's path and a chance for heroics. (Additionally, if you switch from watching with sub-titles and instead turn on the English dubbing The Host becomes a comedy, and a funny one). Two great takes on the action-adventure set-up.
Best Running Movie: Run Fatboy Run
- Also best use of Chelsea Dagger by the Fratellis while a Simon Pegg runs in a speedo.
Best Vince Vaughn Moment: Baby Puke Scene (4 Christmases)
- This is one of the funniest scenes of the year; "Get away from me, I'm going to do it too!!!"
Best Chess on the Screen: 'Body of Lies' & 'Deception'
- Both these movies have a one-two punch of heavy-weight acting with DiCaprio and Crowe trying to decide if they are on the same side in Body of Lies, and Jackman and McGregor playing mind games with each other in Deception. Smart movies, with smart characters, for smart viewers... so pay attention.
Minority Report / Fear of the Future Award: Eagle Eye
- Three reasons to see this movie:
1) the direction by DJ Caruso (Disturbia mastermind)
2) the high Hottie-levels of Michelle Monohan
3) Shia ('nough said, LaBeouf is the man)
Favourite Robot Love Story of the Year: Wall-E
Runner-up for Fear of the Future Award: Wall-E
Best Non-Kung-Fu Animated Feature: Wall-E
Go-Green-or-the-World-will-End Award: Wall-E
The Must-See Straight to DVDs:
- Revolver (why the Brits panned this film and filed it under 'No Good, ship 3 copies overseas for North America' is beyond me, it's Guy Ritchie with a Twist)- Sleuth (Michael Caine and Jude Law play winner takes all and make up the rules as they go, all the viewer has to do is try and keep up)
- Southland Tales (Richard Kelly got confused during pre-production and instead of creating a movie he created an entire messed-up world)
- Numb (I don't know what Matthew Perry did with Chandler, but there is no sign of the goof ball here, Perry's Hudson so messed up you wonder how or why such an lost character moves forward)
- Meet Bill (Can't go wrong with Aaron Eckhart, and after getting pushed around by everyone in his life, he takes a page out of K. Spacey's book and American Beauty's his mediocre life)
- Felon (special thanks to Stephen Dorf for being in a movie that didn't absolutely suck... who is managing this guys career. Felon killed!)
Non-Stop Laughs:
- Pineapple Express
- Role Models
- Step Brothers
- Forgetting Sarah Marshall
- You don't Mess with the Zohan
- Harold and Kumar Escape from Guantanamo Bay
- Yes Man
- Get Smart
- Zack and Miri Make a Porno
- Tropic Thunder
My Own Top-10:
- the Dark Knight
- In Bruges
- Burn After Reading
- Rocknrolla
- Quantum of Solace
- Funny Games
- Iron Man
- Let the Right One In
- the Curious Case of Benjamin Button
- Revolutionary Road
Bonus Pick:
- the Dark Knight (on IMAX) - Yeah that's right, TDK makes the list twice...
- the Dark Knight (on IMAX) - Yeah that's right, TDK makes the list twice...
These are the best movies of 2008. You may want to shuffle them around, squeeze a few off the list, sneak a couple on, maybe even throw together a top 25 or 50, but those are all minor details... The bottom line is, these movies must be seen. Watch them all in one day. Okay, excessive, but put them on your To-Do list, and then Do them. Ready for the Guarentee: I know this, as you wipe away the tears, gasp for air between cackles, feel the warmth of your soul fill your body, put up with the ringing in your ears from the death screams, drop the "What are you kidding me?!?!" cries, manage the adrenaline that shocks your being, reflect on the big picture, appreciate the small things, get up and dance, and above all "Feel", you'll pause, soak it all up, decide that you are madly in love with Film, and find yourself saying, 'Damn Jack, that was a good call. That was Worth the Watch'. Enjoy.
!!! Spoiler Alert - Tropic Thunder !!!
The Will Ferrel from Wedding Crashers / Surprise Performance Award: Les Grossman (Tropic Thunder)
- This was hands down one of the biggest movie events of the year. A lot of people left the theatre with no idea that Tom Cruise was in Tropic Thunder. Hand him an award, hell hand him the award, give him the freakin Supporting Actor Oscar. Les Grossman was such a hit that the TV ad campaign shifted after T-T's opening week and became all about 'Who is Les Grossman?'
!!! Spoiler Alert - Tropic Thunder !!!
The Will Ferrel from Wedding Crashers / Surprise Performance Award: Les Grossman (Tropic Thunder)
- This was hands down one of the biggest movie events of the year. A lot of people left the theatre with no idea that Tom Cruise was in Tropic Thunder. Hand him an award, hell hand him the award, give him the freakin Supporting Actor Oscar. Les Grossman was such a hit that the TV ad campaign shifted after T-T's opening week and became all about 'Who is Les Grossman?'
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